Insult SMSText Messages2017

Plz call me,
its urgent.
Ek accident ho gaya hai.
.
Aap ka hi blood group chahiye,
Plz mana mat karna
.
.
Warna
.
.
GADHA mar jayega

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What? is a difference between
a Kiss, a Car and a Monkey?

A kiss is so dear,?
A car is too dear and
A monkey is U dear.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Twinkle Twinkle little star,
You should know what you are,

And once you know what you are,
Mental hospital is not so far.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
boy: how do i play the guitar?
girl: u should be on TV for ur talent
boy: am i so good??? :D :O

girl: if u were on TV,, i can atleast switch it off

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What is the difference between
Monkey & Donkey ?
Monkey saves this message
&
Donkey deletes this message.

Choice is urs........:p
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
SomeOne..
MiSSES U..
NeeDS U..
Worries About U
Lonely Without U
Guess Who?
THE MONKEY IN
... THE ZOO ..

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How Pakistani professors speak english,

1. Don't dare talk in front of my back!
2.Both of u three get out of the class!
3.Why r u so late.. say yes or no?
4.Take 5 cm wire of any length!
5.I have 2 daughters, both of them are girls.
6.All of u stand in a straight circle.
7.Quiet! The principal just passed away...
8.Everybuddy stand lengthwise.
9.Y r u looking at the monkey outside da window wen I'm here?
10.Ur talking bad habbit.

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Fa=40/
Rexona=35/
Safeguard=30/
Lux=40/
lifeboy=15/
Silk=30/
Imperial=20/

Plz inn main say koi bhi lay lo but aaj naha lo...plz...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Taste this SMS
Did u feel da taste of ginger?
No?
Sure?
Well.....
BANDAR KYA JAANE ADRAK KA SWAAD!!



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Is dil ka kaha mano 1 kaam ker do,
1 bay naam si mohabbat mere naam kar do,

Meri zaat pay faqat itna ehsaan kar do,
Ghar say naha k niklo, poray muhallay ko hairaan kar do

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Yash Johar is producing a new film
& is searching 4 new talent.
I've suggested ur name.
Pls go & meet him.
The movie's name is "AQAL HO NA HO"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Is dil ka kaha mano 1 kaam ker do,
1 bay naam si mohabbat mere naam kar do,

Meri zaat pay faqat itna ehsaan kar do,
Ghar say naha k niklo, poray muhallay ko hairaan kar do

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kion har bar mosam ki tarah badal jate ho,
Har bar hamara dil dukhatay ho,

Yeh bat sun ker hamari roh tak kanp gaye,
Ae dost tum masjidon se chapal or lote churate ho

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hey friend remember that
without stupidity there can be no wisdom
& without ugliness there can be no beauty
so the world needs YOU after all!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Close ur eyes n think about yourself,

ur face

ur style

ur nature

ur smile

ur looks

Now open your eyes

Free main HORROR film dikhai na?

Chalo thanks bol

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A child uses its thumb 2 chew,
an illiterate uses his thumb 2 sign,
a winner uses his thumb 2 show victory,
but a monkey is using his thumb 2 read this sms

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When u feel sad....
To cheer up just go to the mirror and say,
"damn I am really so cute"
u will overcome your sadness.
But don't make this a habit.....
Coz liars go to hell !!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Baharo phool barsao mera "DOST"aya hai.
Hoto pe muskan, gali me mehak laya hai.

Barso tak thi jise pani se "ELERGY"
Woh aaj "LUX" se nahaya hai.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~5)
My eyes detected
My heart reacted
Thousand were rejected &
Only you were selected.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Because I needed a monkey
for an advertisement.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ur 5 qualities:

1---------

2---------

3---------

4---------

5---------

Agar zindagi main kabhi
koi acha kam kia hota
to aj ye jaga khali na hoti

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Boy: Hi
Girl: Hey How Are You . What Are You Doing ?

Boy: I Am Texting To The Most Beautiful Girl Of The World.

Girl: (Emotionally) Awww
So Sweet Of You :) :)
.
.
.
Boy: But She Is Not Replying
So I Am Texting You..:P :P



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Do u remember the day we travelled in a car?
I put my dog out of the window,
u put ur face out,
then people started shouting
'TWINS TWINS'

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ultimate insult..

I Iove your smile becoz..
.
My favorite colour is "YELLOW"


Gf : Am I Pretty Or Ugly?
.
.
Bf : You Are Both
.
.
Gf : What Do Yu Mean Both ?
.
.
.
Bf : You Are Pretty Ugly

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dedicated To All Girls With High Attitude


Sweety ! Don't Be Proud
If Every Boy Wants You..!

Always Remember,
Cheap Items Have Too Many Buyers



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
⇖⇖Boy: your teeth are like the stars

Girl: awww ... Thanks
Are they that much pretty ?

Boy: no, far away from each other⇖⇖⇖⇖

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
No visits...

no calls..

no sms's...

no letters...

no missed calls..

I'm worried...

kya hua zoo walon nay dobara pakar liya kya?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

⇗⇗Where r u?
U r u not replying?
I m worried coz todays paper
I read that due 2 thunder a monkey
has been severely injured.
So if u r safe, SMS me immediately⇗⇗⇗⇗

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⇖⇖I have lots of jokes in my inbox,
But I can't send you all of them,
It will take a lot of time,
So I'm sending you just 1 joke
.
.
.
"You are so beautiful⇖⇖⇖⇖
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You are one of the most CUTE persons in the world!!
Just a second, don't misunderstand.
CUTE means:
Creating
Useless
Troubles
Everywhere..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
God thought that since
he couldn't b everywhere
he made a mother.

Then devil thought that
he couldn't be everywhere
he made a mother-in-law.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

⇖⇖When somebody who is deeply
in Love with you tells that
You are
cute, beautiful, & angelic,
I agree. That's true,
Believe me,
I swear because love is definitely blind⇖⇖⇖

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
⇖⇖Aaj kal tum mushkurati bahut ho,
mere dil ko bhaati bahut ho,
dil kehta hai le jaaun tumhen dinner pe,
par suna hai tum khaati bahut ho⇜⇜⇜⇜⇜
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Teacher : U failure !
At ur age Bill gates stood first in the class
Student : Mind u, Sir,
but at ur age hitler commited suicide

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Most people have 5 senses.
Some people have 6 senses.
But u r blessed with 7 senses.

An extra sense is NON SENSE.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lost in a zoo I saw many animals..
Mouse
BIRD
Monkey
and
.
.
.
! U 2

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
⇖⇖Roses r lal
skies r nila,
ur brain is like khali patila.
Bura man liya?

O.K

Roses r red
skies r blue,
I born smart
what d hell hapened to u.

Thora sa or bura manlo⇖⇖⇖⇖
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Boy: "You Are Like A COIN."

Girl: "Awwww, Valuable .. ?"

Boy: "No, Two Faced"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Flowers+butterfly = A beautiful scene.
Stars+moon = A romantic night.
Rain+monsoon = A lovely weather.
U+ur smile = Bhaago Bhoot aaya.



Today is an international day
for the mentally disabled .

Please send an encouraging
sms to a mentally disabled friend,

as i have done

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⇍⇍⇍Jis waqt khuda ne tumhain banaya hoga,
ek saroor sa uske dil pe chaya hoga...
pehle socha hoga tujhe jannat mein rakh lun..
phir ussay zoo ka khayal aaya hoga⇗⇗⇗
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
⇖⇖Question: Why do men chase women
when they have no intention of marrying?

Answer: For the same reason dogs chase cars
when they have no intention of driving⇖⇖⇖⇖⇖
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In 3 ways u can break d mirror
1.throw stone at d mirror

2. throw de mirror on d floor.

3. stand in front of d mirror and smile by showing ur teeth
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
U r Ultimate
U r Lovely
U r Likable
U r Unique
In short ......
U r ULLU !!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Diff B/W Ignorance & selfcontrol?

When u c mirror & u don't laugh at yourself,
that is ignorance!

&
When i look at u & i don't laugh,
thats called self control:-)
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Read each word Reversely:

A'
suomaF
rotcoD
dloT
eM
tahT
ylnO
latneM
stneitaP
evaH
ehT
tnelaT
oT
daeR
$M$
revenehW
stI
nettirW
'...ylesreveR

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⇖⇖I just feel u....

Whenever I feel u....
I just miss u .....
Whenever i miss u ....
I just wanna See u ....
Do u know why.......

It's juts because

⇖I LOVE CARTOONS
Your network tariff has changed!
Call charges are now calculated according to brain size.
The smaller the cheaper!
Congrats You can make free calls⇖⇖⇖

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Two devils came in 2 my dreams.
They said,
"We want 2 disturb some good person."
I suggest them your name.
They said,
"We cannot disturb our boss."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Press down if you think you are MAD,
I can't believe u did that!
Again?
For God Sake!
Why u still doing it?
Truth is out now!
MENTAL CASE:P
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
⇖⇖Haqiqat samjho ya afsana,
Apna samjho ya baigana,

Hamara aapka rishta he purana,
Is liye farz tha aap ko batana,

kay garmiyan aa gayi hain,
Ab shuru ker do roz nahana⇖⇖⇖

jao nahao (,?. *,?.)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
God has given many qualities to you,
Good look, personality, charm, intelligence,
And many more......this is call as
"Allah meherbaan to gadha bhi pehalwan..."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What is the full form of singh:

S-sardar
I-insaan
N-nahi
G-gadha
H-hai.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
⇎U r a nice person...
but..U have to do 2 things early in the morning...
1st. pray to God so that u can live....
2nd.take a bath so that others can live⇗⇗⇗⇗

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6 truths of life:-
1. ⇖You cannot touch all of your teeth with your tongue.
2. All idiots, after reading the first truth, try it.
3. The first truth is a lie.
4. You're smiling now, because you are an idiot.
5. You soon will forward this to another idiot.
6. There's still a stupid smile on your face⇿⇿⇿⇿⇿